Meredith beats me up (PG-13)

At first we were both giggling. Then it began to hurt. By the time
I realized she was kicking my ass, it was too late to stop her.

It began when Meredith, my new girlfriend, and I were talking
about her day of waiting tables at a funky restaurant downtown.
She was in a mood because a few patrons had come on to her.
It's not hard to see why...in her early 20s, Meredith is perky and
curvy in all the right places. Despite being barely five feet tall,
she has a way of drawing all eyes toward her. She wears her
blonde hair short, exposing her milky white neck and
accentuating her full lips. She looks like a cross between an elf
queen and a gymnast.

Anyway, she was complaining about her rough time at work.
One particular guy had been a pain. "I should have just slugged
him," she said.

"Like you know how to throw a punch," I replied immediately. I'm
not sure why I said that. I mean, I had been being sympathetic to
her...the words just slipped out. Her eyes widened and she
scowled.

"What do you mean by that?" she asked, immediately slapping at
me playfully. "Come on, big guy, I'll go a round or two with you."
She giggled as I stood up and continued throwing playful
punches at me.

I was laughing, too, now. "Be serious," I said while dodging her
small fists. Her hands were much faster than I thought, but she
hadn't managed to hit me a real shot yet. It was sort of like a fly
attacking me...annoying, but not a real threat. "I don't hit girls,
so this isn't fair," I said between laughs.

Now we were both belly laughing even though she kept up her
onslaught. "I don't care if you hit back or not," she said as she
started to find a rhythm with her blows. "I'm still going to hit
you, so you better defend yourself."

I began to circle around, my hands raised in a boxing stance. I
feinted a couple times to keep her off balance, but didn't try to
throw a real punch.

"Wait," she said. "I'm getting hot." With that she stripped her
t-shirt off. She didn't have on a bra underneath. Her small
breasts didn't really need a bra, being quite perky. She still had
on her jeans, rolled up at the cuff. She kicked off her shoes,
showing her red toenails. "OK," she said, assuming her boxing
pose again, "let's go."

One-two-three, she threw three wild punches, harder than she'd
been launching earlier. These actually backed me up, but I
laughed. "What's so funny?" she asked, and I realized that
Meredith had stopped laughing.

"It's just kind of silly," I said. Whap! She punched me right in
the nose as I was talking. It stung like hell! "Damnit!" I shouted,
taking a step toward her. Whap! She jabbed me in the
eye--Whap!--and jabbed me again, this time in the cheekbone. I
held out my hands and yelled at her. "Stop that!"

"Come on, big guy!" she said. What had gotten into her? My face
was stinging. She was too small to have done any damage, but
those three blows had really stung.

"I'm not fighting anymore," I said, starting to head into the
bedroom. Meredith blocked my path.

"Fight back or not, I'm still going to kick your ass!" she screamed
gleefully and began throwing punches again. I managed to grab
both her wrists and held her arms at bay until she tried to kick
me in the crotch. I blocked her kick with my right leg, only to have
her use the opportunity to twist her way from my grip. Whap!
Whap! Whap! Just like that she hit me three more times in the
face.

I yelled at her to stop and grabbed at her wrists again. Meredith
was fast and tenacious, though, and kept breaking away from my
grasp. Whap-whap-whap! None of her punches were
knockouts, but the cumulative effect was becoming devastating.
Soon I dropped to my knees.

Meredith seized my hair and pulled me forward. I was staring at
her polished toenails when she hit me in the back of my neck,
my kidneys, and the side of my ribs. She seemed to be learning
how to punch more effectively the longer she practiced, and all
these blows were painful. She released my hair and I sagged to
the floor.

For a few seconds I lay on the floor, spitting blood and trying to
breathe, not really sure what was going on. Her attack had
become vicious so quickly I'm not sure exactly when I started to
lose my bearings.

As I began to regain my senses, I realized that Meredith, all 100
pounds of her, was walking around me slowly, like a barracuda
circling a larger wounded fish. I began to pull myself to my feet,
only to have her step forward and take my chin into her small
hands. She dug her fingernails into my cheeks and forced me to
look into her steely blue eyes. I saw the excitement and
superiority she felt as she held me in her grasp. Then I realized
the utter humiliation of this little woman, no bigger than a girl,
beating me so easily. My humiliation turned to anger.

Apparently Meredith could tell that I was about to try to fight back.

Without warning she leaned forward and kissed me, long and
hard, driving her tongue into my mouth. Still holding my chin and
grabbing my hair with her other hand so I couldn't twist away,
she probed me violently with her tongue; it was not merely a
kiss, it was a message that she was dominating me.

Abruptly she pulled away. I gasped for air. She smiled. I was
marveling at how sexy her red lips were, curled into such a
triumphant smile, when in my peripheral vision I glimpsed her
right fist hurtling toward my face again.

This punch, finally, was hard enough to knock me out.